The other day I was hit in the face with the fact that I have no idea what I’m working towards. I’ve written posts in the past where I talk about my goals, resolutions, etc. Thankfully, I’ve hit a lot of the goals I previously set for myself so I thought I would re-do my list for the summer.
- Continue to eat healthy. You’re doing amazing so far, sweetie. Keep it up.
- Dress nice when running errands so people don’t confuse you for a homeless person. You never know who you’ll run into. Don’t make it obvious to the general public that you’re a catfish.
- Have a 10/10 book collection. You’re more inclined to read when you have unread books lying around judging you.
- Find a way to move everyday. I’ve started working out more frequently thanks to classes such as yoga, and soul cycle. I prefer classes to workout machines at the gym because they trap you and never let you leave. If you’re not going to a class, just dance around your room or something. Move ya lazy a$$.
- Take some stuff off your plate to focus on what’s already there. Similar to real life, I continue to overload my plate to the point where food falls on my way back to my seat. I have so much going on to where I never excel at anything. I’m someone who signs up for every opportunity presented only to later realize I can’t juggle it all without wanting to pull my hair out.
- Stop being stuck up.
- BE A MORE SELFLESS HUMAN BEING! AND NOT IN A HEY LOOK AT ME I’M SELFLESS WAY. By nature I’m more on the selfish side. I’ve been working on this negative trait of mine. It’s important that I address my negative qualities, and work on them rather than pretend I’m someone who doesn’t have flaws. A lot of people are blind to their imperfections, and it’s only holding them back. Just do all things with love or whatever.
- STOP TALKING SHIT!!!!! Your friends will bother you. It’s natural. Keep it to yourself. People will do weird things. Try to avoid screen-shotting every “weird” thing you come across.
- Life is not a competition. I repeat this to myself often yet it’s never seemed to sink in. I need to stop using those around me as reference points to judge myself.
- UNPLUG AND ENGAGE. Throw your phone away!!! No, but seriously I’m addicted to my phone and it’s disgusting. Your online persona is not real. Social Media is a sham. A dream of mine is to be an online influencer, whether it be through this blog, twitter, insta. What sucks about this profession is that it’s all about what you can project through a screen. Even when working on my Etsy shop I need to spend a ton of time glued to my computer. It’s hard to disengage when everything in your daily life consists of being on a tiny screen. Regardless, there’s no excuse for me scrolling through Instagram at a party. Your friends are around you.. talk to them.. This is such a 70 yr. old uncle rant to go on but it’s important to touch base on.
- Think less. Go to an event without analyzing every minuscule thing that happens to you afterwards. Stop being such a Dan Humphrey. You are not an outsider. It’s not that serious. Just go for a lil, socialize a lil, laugh a lil.
- Stop letting the aunties get to you. You’re happy being alone so why are you always freaking out about getting married. I literally just turned 20 years old. I have no business thinking about marriage at such a young age. I can’t even take care of myself, let alone someone else. Here’s some advice a friend (Aziza) recently shared with me that put things into perspective:
“YOU WILL GET MARRIED
you will have someone love you
and you’ll have to share a bed and a life with them
and that will be fun at first
but then some times you want to just go to chai shai at 3 am
but you have obligations
and you can’t
and sometimes you wanna sleep alone
but you can’t
so live it up now
you have no obligations and you can sleep diagonally in your bed ”
- Be happy wherever you are. When I’m chilling I’ll be freaking knowing that I could be doing work. When I’m doing work I wish I was laying in bed doing nothing. I’m never happy where I am because I feel like there’s always something else I shouldbe doing. There’s no game-plan to life. Do what you feel like while you’re still young and carefree. If you want to sit around watching old Disney movies, go for it. As long as you continue to get your shit done you can do whatcha’ want!!
- Keep in touch with old friends. Maintain relationships. Text people you miss, heck maybe even call them. The joy of catching up with an old friend is hard to replicate.
- Stop being a materialistic wench. This has been a problem for me more than ever lately. I feel like people are constantly judging me based on what I wear + what I own. Stop letting people get to you! Be yourself. Don’t conform and don’t blow your savings on dumb branded shit so you can feel like you fit in for 5 minutes.
- Find a way to make a difference. Be as selfless as Princess Mia in Princess Diaries 2 when she’s giving the little homeless girls free crowns. I dabble in different volunteer projects but I’ve never stuck to anything. Find something you care about and be consistent with it. As much as I adore my life it’s not as wholesome as it should be.
- Life is more than the way you look. I say this often, yet here I am spending all of my money on beauty products in hopes to glow up. 90% of my time is spent working on my physical appearance; oiling my hair, whitening my teeth, masking, etc. No matter what the “Betches” say, your personality is what truly matters. What you give back to the world matters. There is so much more to life than the way you look. Cliché but true. Beauty fades real quick. When I’m 75 I’ll look back at my pictures and sign deeply at how beautiful I once was.
- Stop being the world’s biggest hater. Lately I’ve been petty (fighting people on twitter because I’m bored and looking for a quick laugh, sigh) I need to stop being so judgemental. I’m out here crying that the brown community is so judgy when I am the problem.
- Patch things up with people you have beef with. Everyone knows the quote “forgive and forget” but I never follow that hoe. I temporarily forget what someone has done to me and I’ll be friendly with them, only to remember later and curse their existence. It’s a terrible habit of mine. If someone thinks you’ve forgiven them based on the cues you’ve given them go ahead and actually forgive them! If you need to confront them, go for it. If you still feel uneasy talking to them after the confrontation maybe it’s best to cut them loose. No need to bring bad juju into your life.
- Stop letting people walk all over you! I’m such a push-over. Oftentimes, when in a fight with someone they’ll gaslight me -> painting me as the crazie gal. Thanks to these bad experiences I now run away from confrontational situations. Don’t let other people tell you that your points aren’t valid. Stand up for yourself or no one else will. Remember: you can’t be a shark if you’re toothless.
- Seriously stop treating every event you have to go to as a burden. Events are supposed to be fun. I complain every time I have to get ready to go somewhere. If you don’t want to go, don’t go! You’re allowed to stay in. You signed up for this life, enjoy it.
- START A SUMMER BOOK CLUB. I really want to read the Harry Potter series this summer. I also want to re-read all of Meg Cabot’s books. Ever since I stopped reading YA my life has lost it’s spark.
- If there’s a task looming over your head, freaking get it done. No point in avoiding it and stressing the entire time. Just finish it so you can enjoy your life. I stay running away from my responsibilities, and what good has that done me? NONE THAT’S WHAT.
- Time will fly by and there is nothing you can do about it. I spend a great deal of time worrying about the future. Instead of thinking about everything that will end I need to focus on all the doors that will open up. The possible paths one can take. Focus on all the people that you are about to meet instead of the one’s you are about to leave behind. Attachment will be the reason you will never go anywhere in life. Once you graduate you can pick up and go anywhere. You can visit Tokyo, get a job at google, move to Genovia. There’s so much possibility out there. Keep that in mind the next time you’re crying about how college is about to end.
- Chill out. Growing up is hard.. You’re still learning to cope with all the crazy changes that keep coming at you. When you freak out just remember who you were in middle school and how far you have come. Continue to learn, be a good person, spend time with the people around you currently, and don’t take anything too seriously. Repeat after me: “You’re chill. You’re chill. You’re chilllllll ~~~~~~~”
- Cut anyone who makes you doubt your greatness or casts a shadow on your life. You don’t need the bad energy. At this age, you don’t need to continue forcing friendships. Be cordial with everyone but don’t spend too much time around those you know have a bone to pick with you. “We used to be best-friends” is the only reason some people are in my life. Sentimental value doesn’t overshadow all the pain these people have caused you. People change. People grow apart. Not everyone needs to be in your life forever.